4:30 AM Thoughts (And Why I'm Still Sitting in My Driveway)
Look, I just finished three twelve-hour shifts in a row. My feet are throbbing, I smell like hospital soap and antiseptic, and my brain feels like scrambled eggs. Usually, I need silence. But tonight—well, this morning—I needed to feel an emotion that wasn't panic or exhaustion.
So I put on November 9. Romance. Drama. Colleen Hoover. My mom loves her (she still thinks I should've been a dermatologist, by the way—less stress, better hours). I had the same "let's see what the hype is about" feeling when I picked up It Ends With Us—another CoHo book my mom wouldn't stop texting me about. I figured, let's see if this Ben and Fallon drama can distract me from the guy who tried to fight the ventilator in Bed 6.
And it did. Mostly.
The Tale of Two Narrators
Here's the thing about audiobooks with dual POVs—when they work, they're magic. When they don't, it's like listening to two different radio stations at the same time.
Let's start with the good news. Zachary Webber.
(Can we just clone his voice? Seriously.)
He voices Ben, the aspiring writer, and honestly? He nailed it. His voice is warm, grounded, and has this emotional depth that actually made me believe the guy was falling in love. It's the kind of voice that lowers your blood pressure. After a night of listening to monitor alarms, listening to him was like a warm blanket. If this was just his book, I'd give the performance five stars without blinking.
But then we switch to Fallon.
Angela Goethals... okay, look. I try to be nice. I know narration is hard work. But I literally checked my phone at a red light to see if I had accidentally bumped the speed down to 0.75x. I hadn't. She speaks so slowly. And dramatically.
It felt a bit... labored? Like she was trying really hard to Make. Every. Word. Count.
When you're driving home and you just want the story to move, that kind of pacing is torture. It made Fallon sound younger than she was supposed to be, maybe even a little whiny. I ended up cranking the speed to 1.3x whenever it was her chapter. (Sorry, Angela. Night shift patience is thin.)
The "Is This Actually Romantic?" Check
The premise—meeting on the same day every year for five years—is the kind of thing that only happens in books. In real life? Who has the PTO for that?
But I bought into it. I let myself suspend disbelief because sometimes you just want the fairy tale. The chemistry is there (mostly thanks to the writing and Zachary), and the "writer and his muse" dynamic is compelling, even if Ben's motivations get a little murky.
Then comes the twist.
I won't spoil it, but I actually yelled at my dashboard. "OH, COME ON." It's messy. It borders on toxic. As a nurse, I see people do crazy things for love (or what they think is love) all the time in the ER waiting room, so I guess it's not totally unbelievable. But it definitely walks a fine line between "grand gesture" and "needs therapy."
Honestly, It Starts with Us had a similar vibe—messy relationships that make you wonder if anyone in these books has heard of boundaries.
That said, did I cry?
Yes.
(Carlos asked why I was crying in the car when I finally walked in. I blamed allergies. We live in Arizona, it's a plausible excuse.)
Prognosis
Is it perfect? No. The pacing issues with the female narrator almost made me DNF (Did Not Finish) in the first hour. It drags. But the story has hooks. It grabs you by the scrubs and doesn't let go until you know how the train wreck ends.
Who should listen: CoHo fans, you're gonna listen anyway—just keep your finger near the speed button for Fallon's chapters. Trust me. Who should skip: If slow narration makes you want to throw your phone, or if morally gray love interests make you rage-quit, maybe sit this one out.
It's messy, it's emotional, and it's definitely not how real life works. But after a shift dealing with real life? That's exactly what I needed.
