Look, I'm going to be upfront with you: when I saw this in my queue, I almost skipped it. Horror is my domain. Atmospheric dread, psychological terror, the slow creep of the uncanny - that's my wheelhouse. Erotic parody of a Victorian children's classic? Not exactly what I cover on The Witching Hour.
But here's the thing. Wonderland has always been horror-adjacent. Carroll's original is deeply unsettling if you read it right - the identity dissolution, the arbitrary violence, the dream logic that feels more like a fever nightmare. Divergent plays with similar identity dissolution themes, though in a dystopian wrapper instead of a rabbit hole. So I figured: let's see what happens when someone leans into the forbidden-fantasy angle instead of the existential-terror angle.
What I got was... not what I expected.
Down the Rabbit Hole (Yes, That's a Double Entendre, and No, the Book Won't Let You Forget It)
Melinda DuChamp - clearly a pen name, and honestly, respect for that commitment to the bit - has created something that refuses to take itself seriously for even a single page. The description promises "Beyond Thunderdome" and honestly? That energy tracks. This is a book that knows exactly what it is: absurdist erotica wearing a Lewis Carroll costume.
The classic scenes are all here - the caterpillar, the Duchess, the Mad Tea Party, the Queen's trial - but twisted into kinky set pieces. And I mean twisted. The puns are relentless. Absolutely relentless. If wordplay makes you groan, you will be groaning approximately every ninety seconds. (Shirley - my cat, not the legendary author - kept giving me looks every time I snorted out loud. Judgmental creature.)
At 3 hours and 28 minutes, it's a quick listen. Which is probably for the best, because this kind of sustained absurdity would wear thin at double the length.
Alix Dale Commits to the Chaos
Here's where I have to give credit. Alix Dale's narration is doing heavy lifting. She voices each character distinctly - the Queen has that imperious edge, the Caterpillar drawls with appropriate languor, and Alice herself shifts from confused ingenue to... well, less confused ingenue. The playfulness in her delivery matches the text's refusal to be anything other than ridiculous.
And the passion scenes? Dale commits. She doesn't phone in the steamy bits or rush through them embarrassed. There's genuine heat when the story calls for it, which - given how silly the surrounding material is - takes skill. Balancing "this is absurd" with "but also genuinely erotic" is a tightrope, and she walks it.
No pronunciation issues, no pacing problems. Clean production throughout. For what this is trying to be, the audio execution is solid.
The Problem With Prioritizing Puns Over Plot
I can't pretend this is great literature. It's not trying to be. But even on its own terms, the book struggles with having almost no narrative momentum. Alice goes from kinky scenario to kinky scenario, and while each individual scene has its moments, there's no real tension driving you forward. No stakes beyond "what absurd thing happens next."
For some listeners, that's fine. This is clearly meant as playful escapism, not a character study. But I found myself zoning out between the explicit scenes, waiting for something to actually happen. The puns - god, the puns - start feeling like padding after a while. Silver Borne has a completely different energy - actual stakes, actual tension - which made returning to this feel even more lightweight.
If you're here for the spice and the silliness, you'll get what you came for. If you want story with your smut, you might find yourself impatient.
Who Should Listen (And Who Should Skip)
This is for listeners who want their erotica light, funny, and completely unserious. If you loved Fifty Shades but wished it had more absurdist humor and hookah-smoking caterpillars, congratulations - this exists specifically for you.
Skip if: you need emotional investment in your romance, you're allergic to puns, or you have strong feelings about the sanctity of Carroll's original work. (Though honestly, Carroll was weird enough that I think he might've appreciated this on some level.)
Best consumed during: a solo road trip when you need something that won't put you to sleep but also won't demand your full attention. Or housework. Scrubbing the bathroom while the Queen of Hearts makes demands feels oddly appropriate.
My Cat Remains Unimpressed
I listened to this at 2 PM on a Tuesday while reorganizing my horror collection. Not my usual vibe. But sometimes you need a palate cleanser between Shirley Jackson rereads, and this certainly... cleanses.
It's not horror. It's not even horror-adjacent, despite Wonderland's unsettling bones. But as erotic comedy, it knows what it's doing. Alix Dale elevates material that could've been cringe into something genuinely entertaining. The book itself is thin on substance but thick on... well, you know.
Would I cover it on the podcast? No. Did I have a surprisingly decent time? Yeah, actually. Sometimes that's enough.
